So after a weekend in my home town, I traveled the four hours back to Pittsburgh on Monday to sit down and finish the rest of my homework. Naturally, as a grad student I am constantly feeling overwhelmed. I swear that I have aged about five years during the few months I have been here. (Forwards or backwards I don't know. My acne seems to be coming back though.) I am feeling more and more like a cynical asshole. I was one before but it's gotten even worse. It doesn't help that I am not sleeping well due to the noise from the street in front of my apartment at all hours of the day. After living almost my entire life in a suburban/rural community, being in a very noisy city is not sitting well with me. Add to this my money problems and my constant fear of the people around me and I am on the verge of a psychotic episode.
Because of the holiday weekend I only had one class yesterday. We're getting to the middle of the semester and a lot of us are really showing our stress. Well, my professor decided that this would be a good time for a "pep talk." Except his idea of a pep talk is telling you to suck it up and that it doesn't get any easier, it only gets harder so you better get used to it.
I don't expect life to be easy, I just expect it to get a little easier as I get used to my new role in it. I frowned while he told us this and I gather that I looked like I was going to cry (I was and I did) because my professor picked me out and told me not to give him such a sad look. I wanted to tell him that his little "pep talk" was not a pep talk at all and that he was pushing me one step closer to the mad house. Unfortunately, he interrupted me before I could give any retort whatsoever, which caused me just sit there and cry quietly in disbelief.
Honestly, just because you're a professor doesn't mean that you have the right to be a complete dick and then tell people that it's a pep talk. Just because you tell someone you're feeding them apple sauce when you're really feeding them cow manure doesn't make it apple sauce. Why don't you think a little before opening your stupid mouth?! Maybe then you won't be so confused when people start to cry in your class.
Oh kiddo, how I hear you.
ReplyDeleteThere is such a thing as book smart as opposed to common sense smart and this sphincter obviously flunked the Human Being 101 class, as I remember 75% of my Profs were...hang in there..**hugs**