Over Analysis: The curtains are no longer blue.

I'm sure that many of you who attended high school or are currently attending it, remember your English teacher and his or her over analysis of literature. I believe it was Stephen Crane, author of the Red Badge of Courage, who said of his writings that if one could find a deeper meaning from them then you must be on crack or something similar. For example:

As human beings, we are always trying to find a deeper meaning in EVERYTHING. (*cough* religion! *cough*) This often causes us to over analyze everything. As an information professional, I have read entirely too many papers where scholars demonstrate this terrible habit. Suddenly "the curtains were blue" no longer has the same meaning. Instead the curtains are a symbol of depression and attention deficit disorder with a theme of a ham and cheese sandwich on a sesame bagel being run over by a Prius with flame details. See? If we over analyze something then it loses its meaning and becomes useless to the reader. 

Today I read four papers by four different scholars, all of whom were describing the results of indexing for systems of information retrieval that were used for art and music collections. Riveting, right? One author presented the reader with an entity relationship model that was meant to illustrate how her system worked. And while looking at it made me want to punch a panda in the face, I was able to understand the basic workings of her retrieval system. But she chose to describe EVERY SINGLE STEP IN MINUTE DETAIL. About halfway through her paper, I realized that I was lost and the whole article had lost its meaning. See what happens when you over analyze? 

Maybe it was the way I was brought up through high school in honors English classes. I had a total of three English teachers during my four years of high school. The last one I had for two years in a row, and she was the queen of over analysis. And while I must thank her for her harshness in grading my papers (thanks for all the C's you bitch) because she has made me the writer I am today, she also made me the cynical bitch I am today. And by bitch I mean that I will come out and say exactly what I mean whenever I want. Often times, people are offended by what I have to say, but at least I say what I mean instead of beating around the bush.

I am calling for the simplification of speech and writing. Stop over analyzing everything. Say what you mean and be done with it. Then we can all move on, and I don't have to work so hard to get two-hundred and fifty words on a page for a discussion posting about your boring shit paper you bitch. 

The End.